ParksandRecreation《公园与游憩（2009）》第二季第二十三集完整中英文对照剧本.docx

好的打开这个Okay,openthisone!来我帮你Here,llhelpyou.哇文件哎-是的Wow.Documents.-Yes.这是你实习申请原件你的停车牌原件Thisisyouroriginalinternapplication,youroriginalparkingpass,这是你的证件照片原件-你从我钱包里拿出来的吗thisisyouroriginalphohoID.-Didyougetthatoutofmypurse?没关系的这是你第一张JL资单的复印件Itdoesn'tmatter.Andthisisacopyofyourveryfirstpaycheck.是谁给的呀我是我给的Who'sthatfrom?-Me!It'sfromme!生日快乐-谢谢你LeslieHappybirthday!-Thankyou,Leslie.打开我的-不管怎样就很好Openmine.-Anyway,it'snice.我说把东西裱起来可能有点机智和情绪化Imean,itcanbelittlesavvyandsentimentaltokindaframethings,但能记住一件事的开始总是很好的butit'salwaysnicetorememberthebeginningofsomething.你知道起点嘛当你有那种.Youknow,thestart.Andwhenyouhavethat.哦天哪Ohgeez.Ron苍天啊Ron!ForGodsake.她是个成年人了She'sanadultnow.她应该知道如何负责地处理和使用一件武器Sheshouldknowhowtoresponsiblytohandleanddischargeaweapon.那边那把是SIG-Sauer.22口径蚊子手♥枪♥ThatthereisaSIG-Sauer.22caliberMosquito生产于瑞士是给他们的娘炮警力使用的manufacturedinSwitzerlandfortheirpussypoliceforce.这个双色轻量型号♥完美适用于你这种瘦小的家伙Thistwo-tonedlightweightmodelisperfectforaskinnylittlethinglikeyou.哎呀谢谢RonGee,thanks,Ron.你拿到许可证之前我先替你保存着Iwillholdontothisforyouuntilwegetyoulicencedup.然后我带你去玩目标练习Andthenlltakeyouforsometargetpractice.好嘲Goodie.是我是有点内疚Yeah.Idofeelalittleguilty.我是转送的礼物mregifting.哦那很棒啊我很乐意听到你聊家人度假Oh,that'sgreat.dlovetohearallaboutyourfamilyvacations.嘿-哦感谢上天Hey.-Oh,thankGod.滚开吧KyleGetout,Kyle.你好啊生日女孩Hello,birthdaygirl.你喜欢吗-喜欢Didyoulikethat?-Yes.这个击掌就是你的生日礼物了Thathighfivewasyourbirthdaypresent.开玩笑的不是的"Justkidding.Thatwasn'tit.我还给你准备了点Igotyousomethingelse.我给你写了首歌♥Iwroteyouasong.真的吗-是的是的Really?-Yeah.Yeah.叫什么呢What'sitcalled?我不会说的但给你个提示mnottelling,butllgiveyouaclue.是用一年的一个月份命名的It,snamedafteramonthoutoftheyear.所以是AprilSoApril?不No.用这个可要好太多了Thatwouldhavebeenwaybetter.呃无所谓r我可以重写歌♥词Um.well,whatever.Icanrewritethelyrics.嗯你来参加我的派对吗Um,areyoucomingtomyparty?当然我怎么都不会错过的Yeah,Iwouldn'tmissitfortheworld.你开玩笑吗Areyoukiddingme?好酷-好Okay,cool.-Okay.嗯那我们到时候再见Um,well,we,llhangoutthen.好会很好玩的Okay.-It,sgonnabefun.是的我今天21岁了Yes,Iam21yearsoldtoday.基本上这个年龄所有人都同意Whichistheagethatprettymucheveryoneagrees是个成年人了makesyouanadult.公园与游憩公园与游憩公园与游憩第2季第23集第2季第23集用伟大的19世纪户外活动家JaCkLondOn的话说Inthewordsofthegreat19thcenturyoutdoorsmanJackLondon,“你不能等待灵感你必须拿着棒子跟随”youcan'twaitforinspiration.Youhavetogoafteritwithaclub.让这些话语环绕在我们耳边我们自豪地展示我们Withthosewordsringinginourears,weproudlypresentourplans在市政48号♥地上建造新公园的计划foranewparkonmunicipallot48.这很棒啊-我知道That'sgood.-1know.城市年度预算和计划提案叫做“主计划”Theyearlybudgetandplanningproposalforacityiscalledthe"MasterPlan.*'啊不是很棒吗棒到让人无法忍♥受Ah,isn'tthatjustsoawesomeyoucan,tstandit?大部分都是无聊的官样文字所以我试着让它花哨一点It'smostlyfilledwithboring,bureaucraticlanguage,soItrytospiceitupalittle.“所以我说人的功能是活着"SoIsaythefunctionofmanistolive,“不是存在我宁愿自己的火花不在灿烂的光辉中燃尽nottoexist.Iwouldratherthatmysparkshouldnotburnoutinabrilliantblaze"也不远它被&hearts汗♥腐所扼杀thatitshouldbestifledbydryrot.是你写的吗-JaCkLondon又是Youwrotethat?-JackLondon.Again.JackLondon名言引用太多了吗-不不IstheretoomanyJackLondonquotes?-No,no.是啊再多都不够呢Yeah,Imean,youcanneverhaveenough.这很轻松地成为我听过最激动人心的预算提案Thatiseasilythemostexcitingbudgetproposalveeverheard.反正我今天就展示了Wellmpresentingittoday.如果它通过了我们就能拿到建公园的钱了Andifitflies,we,regonnagetourmoneytobuildapark.我是说我们只花了15个月就做到了这些Imean,itonlytookus15monthstodothis.不敢相信-本来可以是13个月的Ican'tbelieveit.-Itwould'vetaken13months.如果你答应周末也工作的话但还是ifyouhadagreedtoworkonweekend.Butstill.很棒-让人惊叹It'sgreat.-It,samazing.那个会议在10点之后来我办公室喝香槟Well,themeetingisat10.Comeovertomyofficeforchampagneafter.我不觉得我该那么做-哦对MarkIdon'tthinkIshoulddothat.-Ohright.Mark.嗷尴尬了0w.Awkward.我几天前和Mark结束了IendedthingswithMarkacoupleofdaysago.然后And.我不打算聊这个nnotgonnatalkaboutit.女士们先生们这是最后通牒1.adiesandgentlemen,thisisyourfinalwarning.不要错过今晚AprilLudgate生日狂欢Donotmisstonight'sAprilLudgatebirthdaybash.晚上9点就在世界知名的蛇洞酒吧9:00p.m.attheworld-famousSnakeholeLounge,一个被Pawnee口报称作theplacethePawneeJournalhascalled”镇上最性感最危险的酒吧”"thesexiest,mostdangerousclubintown."他们可不是那么写的That'snotwhattheywrote.好吧”性感这个词是我加的Fine,Iaddedtheword"sexiest."但我们雇了更好的保安Butwe'vehiredbettersecurity.是的我开这个派对确实算得上是好朋友Yes,Iamagoodfriendforthrowingtheparty.但我也是个天才malsoagenius,因为我在用这个机会becausemusingtheoccasion把酒吧塞满我认识的所有单身辣妹tostocktheclubwitheveryavailablehottieIknow.说我浪漫吧反正我相信今晚结束之时Callmearomantic,butIbelievebytheendofthenight,我会有1到4个新女朋友Iwillhavebetweenoneandfournewgirlfriends.哦不敢相信我们的小姑娘已经长大了Oh,Ican'tbelieveourlittlegirlisallgrownup.该死这世界的车轮Damnthewheeloftheworld.为何总是持续地转动Whymustitcontinuallyturnover.JackLondon-是啊JackLondon.-Yeah.棒Nice.好了我们走吧老板我们有个会要开Okay.Let'sgoboss.Wehaveameetingtogoto.耶Yay.每年这个政♥府♥的每个部门同处一室Onceayear,everybranchofthisgovernmentmeetsinaroom宣布他们打算把纳税人的钱浪费到哪里andannounces,whattheyintendtowastetaxpayermoneyon.作为一个像我一样的自♥由&hearts注义者真的是哲学意义上的可怕Foralibertariansuchasmyselfit'sphilosophicallyhorrifying.他们在零食上也很吝啬Theyalsoreallycheapoutonthesnacks.欧利欧饼干吗Hydraxcookies?你知道有一种奥利奥的地摊货吗DidyouknowtherewasanOfRbrandhydrox?我不知道Ididnot.但它们不难吃They'renotbad.早上好各位Goodmorning,everybody.我知道你们都有各自的预算准备展示Iknowyouallhaveyourbudgetpresentationsready,但计划有变butthere'sachangeofplans.因为市议会的严重僵局Duetothecripplinggridlockincitycouncil,我们无限期地推迟所有计划和经费决定Wearepostponingallplanningandspendingdecisionsindefinitely.呃直到何时无限期Um,untilwhen?-Indefinitely.何时结束-现在之后Andwhenwillthatend?-Laterthannow.所以大概这周Sothisweekprobably?你看我们已经接近全面危机了Leslie1.ook,weareborderingonafull-blowncrisis,Leslie.州政♥府♥派了一个团队Thestategovernmentissendingateam从印第安纳波利斯前来试图解决这个预算问题fromIndianapolistotrytosolvethisbudgetproblem.如遇主计划会议减少时长IntheeventtheMasterPlanmeetingiscutshort,如遇我有喉炎无法展示主计划intheeventIhavelaryngitisandIcan'tpresenttheMasterPlan,如遇主计划会议改在船上举♥行♥intheeventtheMasterPlanmeetingismovedontoaboat.看我准备好了一切情形1.ook-mpreparedforeverysituation.除了一个没有主计划的情形Exceptfortheonewherethere'snoMasterPlan.冷静点Justcalmdown.你都不知道他们会做什么Youdon'tevenknowwhatthey'regonnado.Ron他们是州级审计Ron,they'restateauditors.他们不是来给我们拍拍肩膀的They'renotgonnacomeandpatusontheback.他们是来杀人放火的They'reheretoslashandburn.我对此没有问题啊Welldbefinewiththat.政♥府♥生病了Thisgovernmentisdiseased.它就像是个又大又胖又生气的懒虫It,slikeabig,fat,angryslob在它不需要的垃圾上花着它没有的钱spendingmoneyitdoesn'thaveoncrapitdoesn'tneed.嗯嗯嗯我想要更多没意义的社会计划好吃好吃好Mmm,mmm,mmm.Mewantmorepointlesssocialprograms.Yummy,yummy,yum.那就是政♥府♥做的事Ron它提供服务That'swhatgovernmentdoes,Ron.Itprovidesservices.他们会消灭我们做的一切我们得和他们斗争They'regonnatrytoeliminateeverythingwedo.Wegottafighttheseguys.他们是州长送来的They'vebeensentbythegovernor.头衔比所有人都高Theyoutrankeveryone.没有任何争可以斗There'snofighttobehadhere.是的你是对的我不会和他们斗争Yeah,you'reright.mnotgonnafightthem.除了我会-好了ExceptthatIam!-Okay.1.eslie1.eslie.当我们这公生气的时候要做什么Whatdowedowhenwegetthisangry?我们从1000开始每次7个倒数Wecountbackwardsfrom1,000bysevens同时想着温暖的小蛋糕andwethinkofwarmbrownies.去你的办公室做这些吧Godothatinyouroffice.我要去你的办公室做这些Godoitinyouroffice.然后我们等着这群人出现Andwe'llwaitfortheseguystoshowup.我要等着你山现I'llwaitforyoutoshowup.什么都不用带除了你美妙的身体Youdon'tneedtobringanythingbutyourgorgeousbody.然后听着服务费不是$15了Andgetthis:Coverchargeisnomore$15,门口报我名字是$13.50saymynameatthedoor,it's$13,50.Andy嘿Andy!-Hey.你今晚来吗酒吧部分所有者Youcomingouttonight,partowneroftheclub?来我问你个简单问题Yes,letmeaskyouaquickquestion.要约会的女孩子年龄最小是多少岁我才不是个混♥蛋♥What'stheyoungestagirlcanbethatifwegoout,mnotatotalscumbag?你知道老规矩年龄的一半加上7Youknowtheoldrule.Halfyourageplusseven.我年龄的一半加上7哦好的Halfmyageplusseven.Oh,okay.我29岁所以29岁的一半Well,m29,sohalfof29.加上7那只有Addseven.That'sonly.20.是.Twentyis.21.-20岁Twenty-one.-Twenty-years-old.21点5岁Twenty-one.-.andahalf.二H岁点五Twenty-one-yearsoldandahalf.是是的Yeah.-Yep.我们那个方程得到了相同结果Wegotthesamethingwiththeequationonthatone.但是问题是如果她稍微小一点呢Here'sthething.Whatifshe'sslightlyyounger?我能跟小一点的约会吗CanIgooutwithsomeoneyoungerthanthat?拜托你完全可以Please,youtotallycan.是Yeah.Tom说没问题Tomsaysit,sokay.那大概意味着有问题Thatprobablymeansitisn'tokay.谢谢你再次见我Thankyouformeetingwithmeagain.我根本不知道我想说什么Idon'tevenknowreallywhatIwanttosay.但我猜我就是不理解吧ButIguessIjustdon'tgetit.你知道我们的关系挺好的Youknow,ourrelationshipwassogreat.Mark诚实说确实很好Mark,honestly,itwasreallynice.但可能你觉得关系很好Butmaybeyouthoughtitwassoamazing,因为你从没和谁约会这么久过becauseyou'veneverdatedsomeoneforsolongbefore.但举个例子我们从来不吵架Well,butforexample,Webarelyeverfought.那不是个好信♥号♥♥你有时候是需要吵的That'snotagoodsign.You,resupposedtofightsometimes.你需要惦记另一个人You'resupposedtomisstheotherperson即使他们才刚刚离开20分钟evenifthey'reonlygonefor20minutes.我就是感受不到这些你呢AndIjustdidn'tfeelthat.Didyou?天我应该多吼你一些的Man,Ishouldhaveyelledatyouwaymore.Paul打,电♥话♥了他们来了Well,Pauljustcalled.They'reontheirway.哦天他们要开始开人了对吧Oh,God.They'regoingtofirepeople,aren'tthey?我只有两年就能拿到养老金了Yeah,Iamtwoyearsfrommypension.放松Jerry我们还不知道呢Relax,Jerry.Wedon'tknowthat.或许这些人会乐于助人令人愉快呢Maybethesepeopleareveryhelpfulandpleasant.有人吗Hello?死神啊Death!离婚申请Divorcefilings?四楼Fourthfloor.你好你好嘿你好吗Hello,hello.Hey,howareyou?你好-嗨Hello,there.-Hi.ChrisTraeger这位是BenChrisTraeger.ThisisBen.你们好先生们RonSwansonHello,gents.RonSwanson.RonSwansonRonSwanson.好吧Okay.我是副主任LeslieKnopemDeputyDirectorLeslieKnope.1.eslieKnope1.eslieKnope.能来这里太棒了Itisfantastictobehere.先生们想参观下吗Wouldyougentlemenlikeatour?我在这世上真的没有更想做的事了ThereisquiteliterallynothingIwouldratherhaveintheworld比起在伟大的Pawnee市公园与游憩部门参观thanatouroftheParksandRecreationDepartmentofthegreatCityofPawnee还有RonSwanson和LeSIieKnope作为导游ledbyRonSwansonandLeslieKnope.好Okay.Ben-我不觉得这是个好主意Ben?-1don'tthinkthat'sagreatidea.我们开始吧-好的1.et'sdoit!-Great!Chris是我见过最积极的州预算审计顾问TChrisisthemostpositivestatebudgetauditingconsultantIhaveevermet.我是说我刚刚跟他眼神接触Imean,Imadeeyecontactwithhim,就像是在直视太阳anditwaslikestaringintothesun.人们我们是从印第安纳波利斯州预算办公室来的People,weareherefromthestatebudgetofficefromIndianapolis.哦这意味着什么呢Ooh.Whatdoesthatmean?简单来说我们在这修补你们的预算1.ook,simplyweareheretotinkerwithyourbudget.把政♥府♥想象成一个坏掉的旋转木马Thinkofthegovernmentasabroken-downcarousel.我们要涂上一层新的油漆We'regoingtoslaponanewcoatofpaint,我们要修好坏掉的扬声器Wearegoingtofixthatbrokenspeakersystem,我们要把那些开心的孩子们andwearegoingtogetthosehappykids重新送上他们属于的木马backuponthehorseswheretheybelong!好吗好Okay?-Yeah.好吗-好Okay?-Okay.是听起来不错-就这样Yeah,that'snotbad.-Thereitis.我的伙伴Ben要在这再呆一会儿Mypartner,Ben,isgoingtostickaroundforalittlebit,我稍后再来andIwillseeyoualllater.回见Adi6s!你们有空吗Doyouhaveasecond?我真喜欢你的衬衫Ireallylikeyourshirt.所以我想聊聊你们觉得Sodliketotalkaboutwhereyouthink部门里哪里有浪费there'swastewithinyourdepartment.从何开始-完全没有WheredoIstart?-Thereisnone.你要具体削减那部分的开支削减多少Whatexactlywillyoubecutting?Andhowmuchofit?我可以一边吃猪油渣一边看着你做吗AndcanIwatchyoudoitwhileeatingporkcracklings?好我们先从人事开始Okay,let'sstartwithpersonnel.能告诉我JerryGergich怎么样吗Whatcanyoutellmeabout)erryGergich?他是这颗行星上最好的人之一他在这广受爱戴Heisoneofthebestpeopleontheplanet.He'suniversallyadoredhere.如果你开除他会出现叛乱的Ifyoufiredhim,therewouldbearevolt.好的你需要理解仅仅为r维持当前状态Okay,youneedtounderstandthatjusttokeepthistownafloat,我们可能就需要将每个部门的预算砍掉40%到50%好吗Weprobablyhavetocutthebudgetofeverydepartmentby40or50%.Okay?嗯但Chris说你们只需要Well,butChrissaidthatyoujusthadto,你知道修补一下youknow,tinkerwiththings.是他那么说因为听起来比Yeah,hesaidthatbecausethatsoundsalotbetter”我们要用大砍刀了”要强多了好吗than"We'regoingtogutitwithamachete."Okay?你是个混♥蛋♥-抱歉你说什么You'reajerk.-msorry?悠着点抱歉这些是真实的人们Easy.-msorry.Thesearerealpeople住在一个真实的小镇在有真实感觉的真实建筑里工作inarealtown,workinginarealbuilding,withrealfeelings.这栋建筑有感觉吗Thisbuildinghasfeelings?可能啊这栋楼历史悠久Maybe.There'salotofhistoryinthisone.可能它真有你为何对此如此冷漠呢Maybeitdoes.Howcanyoubesoblaseaboutthis?因为这些问题不是我造成的Knope女士BecauseIdidn'tcausetheseproblems,Ms.Knope.而是你的政♥府♥Yourgovernmentdid.我从电子表格里找我想要的内容吧谢谢I'llgetwhatIneedfromthespreadsheets.Thanks.邀请他和我一起露营的话怎么才听起来不像同性恋呢What'sanotgaywaytoaskhimtogocampingwithme?Jean-RaIPhio-老帅了大TJean-Ralphio.-Lookinghot,BigT.肘击问好Throwthembows啥该死小妞你想勾引谁呢What?Damn,girl,whoareyoutryingtoimpress?开玩笑的我知道Justkidding.Iknow.走开一行知道了Walkaway.-Yep,yougotit.Donna-Jean-Ralphio-是Donna.-Jean-Ralphio.-Yeah.给你来杯生日酒Gotyouabirthdayshot.谢但现在已经合法了我有点失去兴趣了Thanks,butnowthatit'slegal,vekindoflostinterest.你自便吧Suityourself.所以.So.我猜我们棒极了的新公园要等着了Iguessourawesomenewparkisonhold.你有一点点关于要砍什么的消息吗Youhaveanyideawhatthey'regoingtocut?没-呃Nope.-Ugh.你知道吗你不该等着Youknowwhat.Youshouldn'twaitaround.你该提出你自己的预算计划Youshouldcomeupwithyourownbudgetplan就控制你自己的命运andjustcontrolyourowndestiny.是啊我就是不知道该不该那样扮演上帝Yeah,Ijustdon'tknowifIcanplayGodlikethat.生气的想复仇的上帝没原因地开除JerryAngry,vengefulGod,whojustfiresJerryfornoreason.你会开除JelTy-不是必要You'dfireJerry?-Notnecessarily.我不知道今天只是很烂的一天-嗯Idon'tknow,it'sjustbeenreallycrappyday.-Mhm.早些我打电♥话♥的时候你在哪WherewereyouearlierwhenIcalled?跟Mark聊-又聊啊TalkingtoMark.-Again?是这周很难熬Yeah.Ithasbeenaroughweek.你想一醉方休吗-我真的想Youwanttogetsuperdrunk?-1reallydo.好我们的服务员呢嘿嘿Yeah.Where,sourlady?Hey!Hey.我希望你们都知道我是让TriSh当上Pawnee小姐的关键人员IhopeyouallknowIwasinstrumentalingettingTrishcrownedMissPawnee.你的才艺是什么来着Whatwasyourtalentagain?哦是的看起来棒极了Oh,yeah.Lookingamazing.嘿女士们除了我之外你们还有什么所求的吗Hey,ladies,isthereanythingyoudesireatall,besidesme?太幽默了你太幽默了Sofunny.Youaresofunny!我认真的你喜欢我吗mserious,though.Areyouintome?啥What?灌卜,去吧姨♥子♥Chugthat,bitch!规矩就是规矩Rulesarerules.不Ann听我说听我说AnnNoAnn.Listentome.Listentome,Ann.我知道我有个“主计划”而且它在我面前炸掉了IknowIhada"MasterPlan"anditallblewuponmyface.但你你参加了一次城镇中心会议Butyou.youcameintoatownhallmeeting然后我们认识了成为朋友了那真的太棒了andwemetandwebecamefriendsandthatisawesome.真的太棒了你太棒了Itissoawesome.Youaresoawesome.我爱你-我也爱你但我需要啤酒Iloveyou.-1loveyoutoo,butIneedmorebeer.哦我给你点啤酒耶-耶Oh.mgonnagetyoumorebeer.Yay!-Yay!永远的最佳好友Bestfriendsofever.嘿APriIHey,April.哦天哪你看上去太棒了Oh,mygosh.Youlookamazing.让我看看你-不要1.etmeseeyou.-No.来转一圈-不要Givemeatwirl.-No.太漂亮了-别看我Thisisbeautiful.-Don'tlookatme.不看着我No,lookatme.生日快乐Happybirthday.1射谢Thankyou.我请你喝一杯吗哦等等CanIgetyouadrink?Orwait.行我请得起我请你喝一杯吗Yeah,Icanswingit.CanIgetyouadrink?威士忌纯的Whiskey.Neat.哇你还真是不胡闹啊Wow.You'renotmessingaround.不我没有No.mnot.酒保Barkeep.AndyDwyer见到你太棒了AndyDwyer!It'ssoawesometoseeyou.嘿你也是你好吗Hey,you,too.Howareyou?我来问你个问题我是个好女朋友吗1.etmeaskyouaquestion.WasIagoodgirlfriend?Ann你是个超棒的女朋友Ann,youwereanawesomegirlfriend.真的吗-是啊Really?-Yeah.喔Aw!我才是那个一团糟的人Imean,Iwasthescrew-up.是的你确实是Yeah,youwere.我们关系很好对吧Wehadagoodrelationship,right?天啊我觉得是我们经常吵架God,Ithinkso.Imean,wefoughtalot.我知道我知道我知道那让我问你件事Iknow.Iknow.Iknowthat.Letmeaskyousomething.我好热mhot.那是个问题吗Isthataque