HazbinHotel《地狱客栈（2024）》第一季第二集完整中英文对照剧本.docx

地狱客栈第一季第二集地狱客栈有空房♥好吧下一次大灭绝的时间不是一年之后而是六个月Okay.Sotheexterminationiscominginsixmonthsinsteadofayear.没什么大不了的小小的挫折我们能应付Nobigdeal.Justalittlesetback.Nothingwecan'thandle.只是天使把给我们的时间缩短了一半而已Justangelscuttingourtimetableinhalf.反正拯救灵魂又用不着一整年对吧Butwhoneedsawholeyeartosavesouls?AmIright?就算他们把给我们的时间减半减半再减半Andnexttime,whentheycutthetimeinhalfagainandagain,我们也能应付对吧we,11justhandleit,right?!没错我们会的Yes,wewill.得了吧你启动这救赎破项目时Oh,please,yahadlessthanhalfachancewhenyoustarted胜算就不到五成allthissalvationbullshit.现在亲爱的就更是.Andnow.没一丝希望了Ain,tnosilverliningthistimetoots.当然有只是得更努力地寻找而已Surethereis.Wejusthavetolookalittleharderforit.好吧你寻找希望的同时地狱里的其他人正在惊慌失措Well,whileyou'relookin,therestofHellisgoingnuts.大家早就被这消息吓坏了Peoplearealreadyfreakingoutaboutthenews.看看末日区都成什么样了1.ookatwhat'shappeningintheDoomsdayDistrict.“人驴秀”是什么Err,whatisa"donkeyshow"?没什么Aah,heh,nothing.是我的老板瓦尔他也被这消息吓坏了Myboss,VaLiSjustfreakedoutaboutthenews,too.就像我说的大家都吓得屁滚尿流了1.ikeIsaid,everyone'slosingtheirshit.是呀没错罪人们都绝望了Yeah,that'strue.Sinnersaredesperate.说不定绝望到r为躲过大灭绝什么都愿尝试的地步Maybedesperateenoughtotryanythingtoescapetheextermination?现在是为客栈招募更多人员的最佳时机Thisistheperfecttimetorecruitmoresinnersforthehotel!想法是不错但外面这么乱你真打算出去Cuteideaandall,butyoureallygoingtogooutinallofthis?不然呢别人又不会突然出现在我们客栈门口Well,it'snotlikepeoplearejustgoingtoshowuponourdoorstep.阿♥拉♥斯托给我出来ShowyourseltAlastor!过来尝尝Comeandface-你在这里啊Oh,thereyouare.尝尝我的怒火吧Facemywrath!你是谁啊Whoareyou?我是谁居然问我是谁WhoamI?WhoamI?我是伟大的潘修斯爵士IamthegreatSirPentious!发明家破坏建筑师Inventor,architectofdestruction,非凡的恶棍villainextraordinaire!让他们见识一下老大Woo!Youtell'em,boss.他是个坏小子Ooh,he'sabadboy.如果你说的都是真的我该听说过你才对Huh,wellifallthat,strue,you'dthinkdhaveheardofyou.我上周才刚刚攻击过你Iattackedyouliterallylastweek.我们已经大战过20来次了We'vedonebattle,like.20times.那你一定很不经打Well,youmusthavebeenreallybadatthis.闭嘴给我吓趴下吧Silence!Nowcower!因为等我宰了你之后Forwhenveslainyou,V字三人组就会认可我跟他们的平等地位了thealmightyVeeswillfinallyacknowledgemeastheirequal!等等V字三人组是谁不是什么重要人物Wait,whoaretheVees?Oh,nobodyimportant.3V塔新款沃克斯科技品牌偷♥窥♥镜NewVoxTekdesignervoyeurscopes.让偷♥窥♥邻居变得更有格调Peepingontheneighborshasneverbeenmorestylish.沃克斯科技把您的钱放心交给我们VoxTek.Trustuswithyourmoney.本周的这集没错我♥操♥了你妹那又怎样Thisweek'sepisodeof"YeahIFuckedYourSisterSoWhat?"由沃克斯科技为你呈现isbroughttoyoubyVoxTek.把您的娱乐放心交给我们Trustuswithyourentertainment.沃克斯科技相信我们VoxTek.Trustus.Trustus.Trustus.Trustus.Trustus.Trustus.这才叫好看的电视节目呢Nowthat'sgoodtelevision.维尔维特来电哈喽维尔维特在这地狱般的早晨里你还好吗Hellothere,Velvette.Howareyouthishellishmorning?少废话沃克斯我要你马上过来Oh,cuttheshit,Vox.Ineedyouupherenow!出什么事了亲爰的Whatevercouldbetheproblemmydear?我正在准备一场演出Yourlittleboytoyiswreckingmydepartment你家小白脸却来搅合我的部门whileI,mtryingtopulltogetherashowand-该死的贱♥人♥Fuckingbitch!给我滚过来就是快见鬼瓦伦蒂诺Justgetyourasshere.Now!DammitValentino!老天又来了瓦伦蒂诺跟瓦尔共事就是这么麻烦Ohgod,hereIgo.Valentino.JustanotherfuckindaywithVal.嘿嘿嘿我的人生真悲惨Hey,hey,hey.Fuckmylife.V-表-相信我们-很棒直播安吉尔德斯特沃克斯先生请看这边MrVox!MrVoxI沃克斯先生我有个问题要问您Mr.Vox,questionforyouoverhere.MrVox沃克斯先生就大灭绝时间提前的事您有什么看法Mr.Vox.Whatareyourthoughtsonthenewexterminationdeadline?亲爰的各位我们沃克斯科技公♥司♥Mydearpeople,weatVoxTek一向都走在创新的前沿Enterpriseshavealwaysbeenattheforefrontofinnovation.鉴于当前面临的新城胁Andnowwiththisnewoncomingthreat,我们正在将研发的重点转向保护大家的安全Weareshiftingourfocustoyourprotection.我们很高兴地宣布沃克斯科技即将推出防天使器WearepleasedtoannounceVoxTekAngelicSecurityiscomingsoon.把您的安全放心交给我们Trustuswithyoursafety.先生我们是何时开始研发防天使器的Sir?Uh,whendidwebeginworkingonAngelicSecurity?30秒之前30secondsago.试着说服卡米拉那个贱♥人♥加盟TrytogetthatbitchCarmillaonthebooks再取消我今天所有的安排andcancelallmyappointmentstoday.我得去楼上“灭火”Ihaveafiretoputoutupstairs.不行不能接受Ugh.No.Unacceptable.你被开除了这算什么You'refired.Whatisthis?褶边袖口你当现在是1750年啊快把这女巫才穿的垃圾烧了Wristruffles?Isit1750?Burnitlikethewitcheswhoworeit.维尔维特我看得出你很忙告诉我我们那坏脾气的朋友在哪儿0h,Velvet.Icanseeyou'rebusy.Tellmewhere,sourhotheadedfriendnow?在他的塔楼上Upinhistower,等着某个平脸王子让他冷静下来waitingforaflat-facedprincetocalmhimdown.今天又是什么事让他不爽了Anduh,what'sgothimsooutofsortstoday?谁知道啊他把我最好的模特整崩溃了Whoknows?Buthetoreupmybestmodel.你知道这演出就在眼前没时间等那不幸的贱♥人♥Andyouknow,theshowcan,twaitforthatunluckybitch重新振作起来topullherselfbacktogether.梅丽莎过来Melissa,getoverhere.不不行难看我都想死了是的就要这套No.No.Hideous.Iwanttodie.Eww.Oh,yes.That'stheone.看来这里的一切都在你掌控之中Well,lookslikeyouhaveeverythingundercontrolhere.这还用说去死吧你可以滚了安抚你那不成熟的讨厌鬼去OfcourseIdo.Fuckyou.Nowshoo!Takecareofthepissbaby.你终于来了Fuckin'finally,基蒂再拿一杯酒来Kitty,anotherdrink.你能相信那混♥蛋♥做了什么吗Canyoubelievewhatthatpieceofshitdid?那个忘恩负义的贱♥人♥Theungratefulwhore!瓦伦蒂诺这次在说的是哪个贱♥人♥Umwhichwhorearewetalkingaboutthistime?该死的安吉尔德斯特FuckingAngelDust.还能是谁WhothehellelsewouldIbetalkingabout?那该死的娼夫居然离开了我我是我造就了他Thatfuckingslutwalkedoutonme.Me.Ifuckingmadehim.没有我他不过就是一副略有姿色的臭皮囊Withoutme,he'sjustabagofmeatwithsomemildlyentertainingholes.安吉尔辞职了-不他没辞职但比辞职更糟Angelquit?-No,hedidn'tfuckingquit.It'sworse.他搬走了Hemoved!他认为他能就这样来这里上班然后不回我们家回别的地方去Hethinkshecanjustwalkinhere,work,andthengohomesomewhereelse.你能相信吗Canyoufuckingbelievethat?!他以为能就这样一走了之跑去跟路西法的荡♥妇♥女儿住HethinkshecanrunoffandshackupwithLucifer'sbimbodaughter?安吉尔跟路西法的女儿住在一起了AngelislivingwithLucifer1Sdaughternow?对就是那姨♥子♥Yeah,thatbitch.叫夏基或夏德勒啥的类似这样的男人名字Chalkie,orChandler,or.Idon'tknow.Somethingmannishlikethat.她开了一家客栈我拿哪把枪看上去更性感She'sgotthishoteland-Andwhichofthesemakesmelooksexier?你这是在做什么瓦尔你不能去那里Whatareyoudoing,Val?You'renotgoingoverthere.我要让那滑头花美男记住谁是他的主人Thatslipperytwinkisgoingtorememberwhoownshim.我对天发誓我要把那臭屎坑的每个人都操一遍mgoingtofuckeveryoneinthatrancidshithole,IsweartoGod.瓦尔想一想Val!Thinkaboutit.我们品牌的形象是“完美”Ourbrandisperfection.你觉得满城追一个贱♥货♥Andwhatdoyouthinkchasingwhoresaroundtown对我们的形象会有何影响willdoforourimage?有损形象Fuckitup?没错你想让别人觉得你管不住自己的员工吗Right!Doyouwantpeoplethinkingyoucan'tcontrolyouremployees?不想-就是啊No.-Exactly.再说他跟公♥司♥的合同还在And,hey,youstillhavehimundercontract.他哪儿也去不了Heisn'tgoinganywhere.所以你应该Soyoushould.?什么都不做好主意Donothing?这才是他们付你高薪的原因Greatidea.Now,that,swhytheypayyouthebigbucks.但我真的很想找个人当枪靶子ButIreallywantedtoshootsomeone.好吧我去把本月收入最低的人叫上来Well,letmecallupthelowestearnersthismonth.你太了解我了Oh,youknowmetoowell.知道吗安吉尔不是唯一一个跟魔鬼公主一起Youknow,Angelisn'ttheonlyonespendingtimeatthisrattyhotel待在那破客栈的人withthedevil'sprincessa.还有谁在那里欠你钱的人吗Oh,whoelseisthere?Someonewhoowesyoumoney?那人欠我们的远远不止金钱广播恶魔也在那里Someonewhoowesusmuchmorethanmoney.TheRadioDemonisthere.你刚刚说什么Whatdidyoujustsay?你听到了Youheardme.阿♥拉♥斯托回来了还跟路西法的女儿在一起AlastorCamebackandheiswithLucifer'sdaughter,这居然不是你告诉我的第一件事andthatwasn'tthefirstfuckingthingyoutoldme?!嘿杀阿♥拉♥斯托是你的怪癖Hey,killingAlastorisyourkink.求你了快住手Arrgh,Oh!Please!Stop!阿♥拉♥斯托我觉得他已经受不了了Um,Alastor?Ithinkhe'shadenough.哪有他还没完全满足呢Nah,he'sgotafewmorehitsinim!谢谢你给了我又一段不值得记住的经历Thanksforanotherforgettableexperience.谢谢你放松了警惕Thank.you.forlettingyourguarddown!攻击糟了Haha!Yah!Oh,shit.看来我得去一趟裁缝店了Well,itlooksasthoughIneedavisittothetailor.祝好运朋友们-等等你要走了Bestofluck,chums.Wait.You'releaving?阿♥拉♥斯托我们需要你帮忙需要你做好本职工作Alastor,Weneedyourhelp.Weneedyoutodoyourjob.我们需要一堵墙Weneedawall.没问题Ofcourse.这可是我的新项目哪能这么快就残破不堪Can,tletmynewprojectfallintodisrepairalready.不然媒体会怎么报道Whatwouldthepaperssay?嘿俏脸稍后你有什么安排Hey,sweetcheeks.Whatyoudoinglater?我喜欢有巨大.“工具”的男人Ilovemeamanwithagiant.tool.看到没瞧他跟那家伙调情的样子他甚至都没给他钱See?Look,athowheflirtswiththatguy,andhe'snotevenpaying.这人是谁我要杀了他全家沃克斯Whoisthat?mgonnafuckingkillhiswholefuckingfamily.Vox?Vox?那个混♥蛋♥回来了Thatfuckerisback!是呀我也以为他不会回来了Yeah,Ithoughthewasgoneforgoodtoo.已经七年了It'sbeensevenyears!你还在为那次他差点打败你而生气Youstillpissedhealmostbeatyouthattime?去你的-只是说说而已Uh,fuckyou.-Justsaying.他走之后这里发生了很大变化Thingshavechangedalotsincehelefttown.那还用说That'sforsure.我要让他知道如今谁是老大Igottosendamessageofwho'sreallyinchargeofthingsnow.欢迎回家我会让你希望自己没回来向新现状问好大家都知道我们已进入新时代打开电视摄像录音开拍倒数三二Camera,speeds.Rollingin3,2.突发新闻欢迎收看本节目七年之后某个过了气的人再次出现不起眼的窝囊废返回艺术渲染有人想念他吗有人注意到吗尽在今晚的节目-广播恶魔回来了-他回来干吗这对你的家人意味着什么我有个好消息他是废物是化石-我没敌意但-他是个胆小鬼服从并付款这就是真♥相♥想抢我的观众做梦大家能看到我却几乎听不到他别再浪费时间在他身上他说的话一个字也别听我希望他之前假期过得愉快但他就不该回来他躲在电台里时裁缝店我们转向了顺他的媒体渠道如今已过时跟沃克斯共享鹿肉从他离开后地狱变得更好他去了哪儿谁在乎啊大家好能再次广播我很高兴广播中是的我知道已经很久没有有格调的人给地狱的罪人们带来欢欣鼓舞的节目多陈旧的声音Whatadatedvoice!胜过追逐名利的平庸视频播客Insteadofacloutchasingvideopodcast拜托-沃克斯没有安全感Comeon!想引诱观众搞些昙花一现的潮流-都没起作用-别听他胡言每天他都换新花样我是你们的未来他是未来到达之前的粪便沃克斯真有他说的那么强大还是有人在背后撑他没有另外两个V他就不如一个屁一派胡言Ohplease.告诉你最精彩的部分他曾邀请我加盟等等我谢绝了所以他很生气大家好好回味吧你个老混♥蛋♥我要让你尝尝痛苦的滋味电视图像正在缓冲我要毁了你恐怕你没了信♥号♥♥mafraidyou'velostyoursignal.地狱客栈广播中我们开始吧我会让你希望我没回来好好收听等我完事后你所谓的现状将不复存在哦真是叫人期待没信♥号♥♥可恶Fuck!我们有麻烦了Wehaveaproblem.阿♥拉♥斯托现在跟晨星小公主走得很近AlastorisgettingclosetoLittlePrincessMorningStar.所以我们的当务之急是确保路西法的小崽子Soourmainconcernnowisensuringthatnodealiseverstruck和那微笑怪物之间不会达成任何协议betweenLucifer'sbratandthatsmilingfreak.我们怎么才能阻止他们呢Well,howexactlyarewesupposedtostopit?往他们内部安插点什么这是我让贱♥人♥听话的惯用手段Putsomethinginsidethem.That'showIgetthebitchestobehave.在他们内部安插个人这主意或许不坏Wellmaybesomeoneontheinsideisn,tsuchabadidea.安吉尔会愿意吗DoyouthinkAngelwould?那瘦长的混♥蛋♥都不回我的电♥话♥Thatlankyprickwon'tevenreturnmycalls.我们需要一个Weneedsomeone嗽心肠小姐”会接纳的人whoLittleMissBleedingHeartwouldtakein.一个可怜绝望又跟我们没直接联♥系♥的人Someonepathetic,desperate,withnodirecttiestous.地狱这一边所有倒霉的窝囊废都被我雇了还有谁能找Iemployeverydownontheirluckloserthissideofhell.Whothefuckisleft?我正好有个合适人选IthinkIhavejusttheone.进展如何Sohow'ditgo?一个新人也没招到Notasinglenewrecruit.可不是谁不想把最后的时间花在做♥爱♥打架上啊Yeah.Well,whowouldwanttousetheirlastdaysnotfuckingandfighting?你好啊我亲爱的Why,hello,mydear-等等我没有恶意Waitwaitwait!Icomeinpeace.你来这里做什么Whatareyoudoinghere?维姬怎么了你好又见面了Vaggiewhat,stheproblem?Oh,helloagain.我不是来打架的Ididn'tcomelookingforafight.Iuhh.我听说你们在帮助别人Iheardthatyou'rehelpingpeople.那些想变好的人是吗Peoplewhowanttobebetter?没错欢迎来到我们的治愈之家Youheardright.Welcometoourhomeofhealing.我们的康复度假村我们的Ourresortofrestoration.Our-你疯了吗Areyoufuckingnuts?这笨蛋六小时前还想杀了我们呢Thischumpwastryingtokillus,like,literally6hoursago.现在你要让他进来跟我们一起住Andnowyouwanttobringhiminheretolivewithus?当然这里是提供改过自新机会的场所Absolutely!Thisplaceisaboutsecondchances.有谁比这个Andwhodeservesonemorethanthis.滑溜溜的特殊滑头小男人更该得到这样的机会slithery.slippery.speciallittleman.你不是该保护这个地方吗Aren'tyou'resupposedtoprotectthisplace?我想没有那台战争机器他应该不会构成威胁I.guesshe,snotmuchofathreatwithoutthewarmachine即使有也不会orevenwiththewarmachine.谢谢太感谢你了Oh,thankyou,thankyou,thankyou,thankyou!潘修斯爵士欢迎来到地狱客栈SirPentious!WelcometotheHazbinhotel!亲爰的谢谢你你不会后悔的Oh,nodarling,thankyou.Youwon'tregretthis.我觉得他最多只待得了一个星期Eh,Igiveyouaweektops.门房♥好.这里是酒吧这位是调酒师So.thisisthebarandthebartender.这是窗帘Thisisthecurtain,你弄坏了原来的墙这是后来建的新墙andthisisthenewwallafteryoubrokethelastone,heh,然后这个是and,oh,this,thisis亲爱的没必要带他参观每个细节Babe,youdon'thavetoshowhimeverydetail.抱歉我们有了第一位真正的住客让我太激动了Sorry,mjustsoexcitedtohaveourfirstrealguest!那我算什么Uh,whatthehellamIthen?你是我们这个大家庭的重要组成部分安吉尔Well,you'reanimportantpartofourfamilyhere,Angel.不过你Butyou,Um,uh.总是损害我们形象性骚扰这里的员工Constantlymakeuslookbad,sexuallyharasstheStaff而且从没尝试改一改andhaveliterallyneveroncetriedtoimprove?她的意思是难得有人对这里感兴趣多好啊Whatshemeansis,it'sjustnicetohavesomeoneinterestedforonce.这位是我们的清洁人员妮芙蒂OverherewehaveourmaidNiffty.坏小子又回来了别再离开我了Thebadboyisback.Neverleavemeagain.我们有八成的把握她不会伤人We'reabouteightypercentsureshe'sharmless.这里的这位是Andoverherewehave-阿♥拉♥斯托我们亲切的设施管理经理Oh,uh,Alastor,ourgraciousFacilityManager!这是我们最新的住客潘修斯爵士你们已经见过了You'vemetournewestguest.SirPentious.Hehheh.没错你就是那个毁了我外套的家伙Ah,yes.You,retheonewhoruinedmycoat现在我绝对会记得你Idefinitelyrememberyounow.我想这是给你上第一课的好机会“如何道歉”Well,Iguessthisisagreattimeforyourfirstlesson:"Howtoapologize'1.做出积极改变的第一步就是承认自己犯的错误Thefirststeptobecomingabetterpersonistoadmitwhenyouarewrong,尝试一下吧.好的Whydon'tyougiveitatry?Yes,um.广播恶魔先生Mr,Um,RadioDemon,sir,请原谅我攻击了你毁掉了你漂亮的外套pleaseforgivemeforattackingyouandruiningyourverylovelycoat.还你Um,here.虽然只是一小片布但很少有人能从我身上拿走这么多Oh-ho,notmanypeoplehavebeenabletotakeeventhismuchoffme.这对你来说一定意义重大Itmusthavemeantquitealottoyou.既然来了新住客Now!Withanewresident,大家就该互相熟悉一下这很重要Ithinkit,simportantweallgettoknoweachother,所以我们要玩一个小游戏sowearegoingtoplayalittlegame.大家跟我学Everyone,followme.我叫夏莉我喜欢唱歌♥MynameisCharlie.Iliketosing.大家互相了解是最棒的事Andwhenwegettoknoweachother,it,sthegreatestthing.我叫潘修斯爵士喜欢制♥作♥Myname,sSirPentious.Iliketobuild.尽管我的蛋蛋们很蠢我认为我很有技能AnddespitemystupidEggBois,IthinkI'mveryskilled.这太愚蠢了Thisisstupid.这并不愚蠢这只是游戏潘修斯爵士做得很好所以现在请你也照做我没嗑嗨玩不了这个Iamtoosoberforthis.那就习惯一下学学怎么玩因为我们会玩一整天Well,getusedtoitandlearnhowtoplay.“哦我是个街头恶人从没得到过足够的拥抱"Ohmabadmanonthestreetswhonevergotenoughhugs.""能买♥♥我可♥卡&hearts烟♥的天真小孩在哪儿”"Now,where'saninnocentkidIcansellcrackto?*'哇这是谁写的Wow.Whowrotethis?很不错吧继续It,sgreat,right?Keepgoing.“嘿你m"Heyyou."谁我Who,me?“是啊你看上去很像需要魔鬼可♥卡♥因♥的小孩”"Yeah,youlooklikeakidwhocouldusesomedevil'sdandruff."这都写的什么呀Oh,forfuck'ssake.我不要我得回家学习Notme.Ihavetogohomeandstudy.“来吧孩子"Comeonkid,"抽了会让你像我-样酷.可♥卡♥因♥瘾君子”it'llmakeyoucoollikeme.Thecrackhead!"唯一酷的事是拒绝毒品Theonlycoolthinghereistosaynotodrugs.好了如果你不介意Now,ifyou'llexcuseme,我要走了我决定婚前不发生性行为mofftonothavesexualintercoursebeforemarriage!太好了棒极了Yes!Oh,bravo,bravo!哇潘修斯照这个速度你很快就会得到救赎的Wow,Pentious,atthisrateyou'llberedeemedinnotime.我.要去睡觉了I.mgoingtobed.潘修斯爵士我真为你感到骄傲Iamsoproudofyou,SirPentious.真是太精彩了-谢谢夸奖Thatwasamazing.-Thankyou.你今天的表现太棒了-谢谢喜欢我Thatwasbeautifulworktoday!-Thankyou.Youlikeme.你是真的喜欢我Youreallylikeme!安吉尔德斯特直播语♥音♥信箱瓦伦蒂诺安吉尔宝贝回家吧Angel,Baby,comehome.没有你一切都不一样了我想你回来吧It,snotthesamewithoutyouhere.Imissyou,comeback安吉尔你个贱♥货♥如果你不回家Angelyoubitch,Ifyoudon'tcomehome,接下来的一年你将沦落为满身油腻的卡车司机Youwillbefuckinggreasytruckersforthenextyear-嘿我的爰我不是故意要对你吼的可你知道我有多为你疯狂Hey,amorcito,Ididn'tmeantoyell,butyouknowhowcrazyyoumakemef-你这该死的荡♥妇♥嘿小安刚才的消息Youfuckin'slut!Hey,Angie,aboutearlier-杀你全家工作的压力真的很大Killyourwholefuckingfam-Work,sreallyStressful-吮鸡♥巴♥的臭狗屎.1.ittlecocksuckingpieceofshit-你真以为自己可以改变Youactuallythinkyoucanchange?像你这种吸毒成瘾的垃圾是不会变的我们很快就会再见的宝贝Addicttrashlikeyoudoesn,tchange.llseeyousoon,baby.对不起小肥块现在不是时候Sorry.Notnow,FatNuggets.你这鬼鬼祟祟